oomshi:

vegay:

dONT BE A TEACHER IF U DON’T LIKE FUCKING KIDS????

this can be taken two ways

excalilbur:

excalilbur:

i have more followers than there are people in my school

people who do math homework in pen are fearless

jazuthewasianprincess:

olgg:

If I was a famous actor and had a horde of fangirls, I would stay single, and every time an interviewer asked me about my love life, I’d answer that “there’s this one girl I saw at a meeting with fans. I don’t know her name, because of all the fuss with the autographs, and I have only seen her once, but I’m in love with her.” I’d say that, looking all sad and lonely.

Imagine all the fangirls’ faces.

just calm down a second there, satan

fuckinq:

I went jogging this morning and i noticed a guy was following me and i was so scared lmfao my heart was pounding and then he finally caught up to me and said “hey you dropped 50 bucks” and i took it and started running and while i’m running i’m laughing because the 50 dollars didn’t belong to me

thearchangeltrickster:

the-absolute-funniest-posts:

davidsreality:

laughing-llama:

Plot twist: the-absolute-funniest-posts stops self-promoting

Thats not a plot twist thats a miracle.

Follow this blog, you will love it on your dashboard

I can’t tell if this is them being sarcastic assholes or not

It does not matter how slow you go as long as you’re not my internet connection.

hazwards:

this is the exact reason why i dont talk to anyone anymore

carbohydrate:

who has a crush on me. this is very important i need this for research i am a scientist

tommofacts:

do they put tattoos on wax figures because one direction

ivegottobethere:

ima-ho-ho-ho:

rneerkat:

snapfox:

rneerkat:

rneerkat:

what happens to nitrogen when the sun rises

it becomes daytrogen

I’m going to bed.

good nitrogen

sleep tightrogen

don’t let the bed bugs bitrogen